Comedian Baitem Maul Inspired Fudgy Pot Brownies; where the brownies aren’t the only things baked

Photo courtesy of https://www.instagram.com/marty_dzed/

Ingredients

  • 1 cup 8oz/240g unsalted canna butter, melted and cooled
  • 2 tablespoons (30ml) cannabis infused coconut oil
  • 1 1/4 cups (9oz/260g) white sugar
  • 1 cup (7oz/200g) packed light brown sugar
  • 4 (2oz/57g each) large eggs, at room temperature
  • 1 tablespoon (15ml) pure vanilla extract
  • 3/4 teaspoon salt
  • 1 cup (3.5oz/130g) all purpose flour
  • 1 cup (3.5oz/100g) good quality, unsweetened cocoa powder
  • 7 oz (200g) roughly chopped chocolate or large chocolate chips

Instructions

  • Preheat oven to 175°C | 350°F.
  • Lightly grease an 8×12-inch baking pan* with cooking oil spray. Line with parchment paper (or baking paper); set aside.
  • Combine melted butter, oil and sugars together in a medium-sized bowl. Whisk well to combine. Add the eggs and vanilla; beat until lighter in colour (another minute).
  • Sift in flour, cocoa powder and salt. Gently fold the dry ingredients into the wet ingredients until JUST combined (do NOT over beat as doing so well affect the texture of your brownies).
  • Fold in 3/4 of the chocolate pieces.
  • Pour batter into prepared pan, smoothing the top out evenly, and top with remaining chocolate pieces.
  • Bake for 25-30 minutes for just under-done brownies (fudgier texture) or until the centre of the brownies no longer jiggles and is JUST set to the touch OR 35-40 minutes if you like your brownies well set and firm.
  • NOTE: Brownies will continue baking and set in the hot pan out of the oven. If testing with a toothpick, the toothpick should come out dirty for fudge-textured brownies.
  • After 15-20 minutes, carefully remove them out of the pan and allow to cool to room temperature before slicing into 16 brownies. They set while they cool.ENJOY!

OPTIONAL ADD INS:

  • Crushed walnuts, peanuts, almonds, pecans, etc. Chocolate chips, peanut butter chips, shredded coconut, dried fruit (cranberries, raisins, etc)

STORING:

  • Store at room temperature for 3 days, or refrigerator for up to 5 days. These brownies can also be frozen for up to 3 months. Thaw overnight the refrigerator and bring to room temperature before serving OR reheat in the microwave.

Notes

*For thicker brownies, bake in a 7×11-inch pan for 40-45 minutes. For thinner brownies, bake in a 9×13-inch pan for 18-20 minutes.

PLEASE NOTE: An 8×12-inch pan bakes the most perfect brownies — thickness and texture.

TIPS AND TRICKS:

  1. Do NOT over beat your batter once the flour and cocoa powder are added. That creates air pockets in the batter which will give you cake-like textured brownies.
  2. Please try not to over bake them. Set a timer if you need too. I like mine at exactly 23 minutes in an 8×12-inch pan. You can go a little bit over if you like them set a bit more, but I don’t recommend it if you’re looking for the fudgiest brownies in the world. Remember, they will continue to bake slightly in the hot pan once pulled out of the oven,
  3. I bake my brownies on the top shelf in the oven. I find the middle shelf cooks them a lot faster, slightly burns them on the top and dries them out.

Talking to my tribe today on more then one occasion within that day I found myself having conversations around the word JOY. It was serendipitous that this 3 letter word was on the minds of those around me, because I was truly feeling it and actively manifesting it everyday. Feeling joy can be tantamount to our self care and also self identity especially for the community I identify with (queer, black, kinky and polyamorous) To be a minority, within a minority, within a minority (yeah imagine how I feel…ha!) the small victories that affirm and validate who you are can be the single most exuberant experience of your life. But alas that doesn’t happen everyday, so how do we cultivate, multiply and share our JOY?

With so many legitimate reasons for Black women to feel despair about the world, sharing light moments is a distinctive, even radical choice — and it may be why “Black joy” has resonated with so many.

Ayana Lage – What Black Joy Means to 7 Black Women

In this day and age of division, divisiveness and all around bad news it can seem almost impossible to create and foster the ability to see joy in life’s everyday trial and tribulations. Which is why I enjoyed this article from Bustle about how black women viewed JOY and what it meant to them in their personal experiences. How do you experience or foster joy? This was a question that I asked myself after reading this article. There were things that I could relate to reading the perspectives of each of the women from religion, family and even celebrating successes but there was something that for me was very personal in searching my own soul.

mimagephotography/Shutterstock

My wife loves to watch reality TV, haha. She is kind of addicted to it. I don’t really care for it, but I will now and again indulge with her and try to follow the ever more dramatic story lines from shows like “Love and Hip Hop”, “Real Housewives” and “Braxton Family Values”. Aside from being at minimum a guilty pleasure, it also gives the viewers a inside vision of what relationships between black women can be. The (mostly) good, the (sometimes) bad and the ugly. And through this I realized that we as black women have a horrible track record with our sisters and the manifestation of that is now on display for everyone’s entertainment. Part of Black Girl Magic is finding and fostering Black Joy but how can we do that when our own ties are frayed? Myself personally I have always had good relationships with other women because I had models of that at home. My Mom and aunt were always reaffirming and building each other up, my many Buddhist “mothers in faith” who were the epitome of perseverance, cheer and winning; showed me examples of creating valuable relationships no matter how challenging. But what if you never had those models. How do you learn to ‘be your sister’s keeper’?

photo credit @shademgmt

As with everything it starts with US! How can I expect to know how to make those that oppress us respect and honor our lives if we cant do it for each other? How can we embrace our natural gifts, talents and skills if we are always looking down at others and their talents that are different then ours? When will be realize that my black girl magic is equal and in proportion to my sister’s black joy? They are not only one and the same but they are contingent on each other. I always loved the phrase “Your vibe attracts your tribe”, yeah I know VERY hippie of me LOL! But this is truth and I experience it everyday! When I make space to rejoice and foster my tribe’s joy my joy in turn is doubled. And that positive vibration continues to reverberate and thereby attracting even more of the same wavelength to crescendo into a tsunami of joy. So imagine if we all did this? Imagine that we are reverberated and multiplied this Black Joy wave to engulf the world not only in a hashtag #blackjoy or #blackgirlmagic but in a seismic shift felt by our culture and our generation. Now THAT is the real MAGICK of a black girl.

So whats wrong with smoking a little cannabis, or eating a infused cookie? So many parents are now beginning to understand the benefits of cannabis in their personal parenting routine. I know that I have. Life is difficult and having the added responsibilities of children, career and allowing for personal relationships leave a finite amount of time for self care as a parent. After giving birth to my son and not knowing what was going to happen with him or even with myself I felt the weight of new motherhood on my shoulders. Anxiety, guilt, doubt and worry were my only companions. It was not a fun time. I couldn’t be present for him as I wanted to be since inevitably all of my energy was expended in feeding those devilish functions.

“Only those who’re high on the herb can truly appreciate Marley. Lean back, enjoy life and really listen to him. ‘…every little thing gonna be alright…

― A.K. Kuykendall
Photo by Pixabay

I was listening to this podcast the other day called Unerased: The history of conversion therapy in America. The episode in particular highlighting the Mama Bears, they are a group of moms who would step in when a LGBTQ person needed a parent and they had been disown by their own families. That was so powerful! Not only was the child honored and accepted but the Mama’s were able to feel fulfilled and hopeful in helping others in a time of need.

We canna moms need groups like that! I mean to be completely accepted, seen and honored not as a bad parent or having questionable morals, but as a evolving person doing the best that we can, as a woman (or parent, cause this goes for Dad’s, step-parents, hell any type of caregiver really!) still trying to hold on to some semblance of who they are; all while nurturing a whole other being. I needed to understand that I have tools at my disposal; tools that when used correctly make me the BEST parent! Community is one of those tools, so is cannabis. Comradeship is a great way to combat loneliness, depression, stigma and all other manners of attacks that we undergo on a daily basis. There are some forums out there, I wont name them because I understand the need for discretion and also anonymity. Currently there are parents that are scared of child protective services taking their children because of their responsible cannabis consumption. I am so disheartened to hear that and it should not be like that, just as millions shouldn’t be incarcerated because of the plant. But that is a whole nother blog post.

But you know what? Do that goggle search! Start talking about responsible consumption with other moms, dads, family members and friends. Make it a part of the lexicon, and not just something to whisper in ears and behind closed doors in hushed conversations. As the saying goes nothing in the dark can be addressed. So lets bring this wonderful medicine into the light, lets share candidly and openly about our experiences and how it has helped. Even if one tired, overstretched parent gets a good chuckle or a moment to feel connected and human again, then our job is done.

I am changing the conversations and also assumptions we have about people who smoke (especially caregivers), will you join in on making the movement better. The more variety of life stories we see, the better; the more experiences we allow in the space the better. Holding a sacred space for those conversations are paramount to the de-stigmatization and acceptance of caregiver use of cannabis. The more united we can become. We are never as alone as we think we are. If we only look at what divides us then we will NEVER have time to see what actually makes us all the same, and isn’t that what the man wants?!?

“Many drugs, or intoxicants, soften this sharp subject-object dichotomy and help us feel more connected with the wider world. Such experiences dismantle the instrumental nature of most thinking and instead allow us to appreciate life for its own intrinsic value.”

Robert C. Fuller, PhD, a professor of religious studies at Bradley University and author of 13 books, including Stairways to Heaven: Drugs in American Religious History.

Of course cannabis and spirituality go hand in hand. I mean isn’t the sacred ritual of rolling a blunt as consecrated as the giving of sacrament and taking in of the body of Christ? There has always been something otherworldly about our religious connection whether within the confines of a church, temple or a heady music concert surrounded by energies. The human drive to feel connected and “plugged in” is what I believe to be the basis for all spiritual euphoria. I remember being younger and feeling like my wheels were always spinning. I was constantly running to encourage, to engage to fulfill my mission as a Nichiren Buddhist. It was some of the best times in my life. And I also remember the distinct sting of withdrawal when I had stopped actively practicing. I likened it to being a drug addict although I knew that was a bit melodramatic it didn’t take away from the underlying sentiment. And when I shared with others that were in the same boat as me they would shake their heads in quiet agreement. They understood what I meant, they GOT it. So I wanted to explore and understand why and how did I have this type of experience? And how do I enhance and use that on a daily basis with cannabis?

Reach your highness

When I began this journey of medicially using cannabis for my son and then for myself, I couldn’t help but notice that in ingesting cannabis not only helped me to better see myself and just “be” in the moment by quieting my mind, but it also helped me to better connect and see things from a new set of eyes. Cannabis assisted in bringing about a softening of the armor that I wore to protect me as a black woman and a freeing of the heart in compassion toward myself and also those around me. I felt lighter, free-er and also more open to the positive changes that I desired and chanted for. This was surprising to me because as someone who only used cannabis for recreational use, with no regard to the sanctity of this plant, I had overlooked one of its biggest benefits. The usefulness of connecting to a higher conscience and aiding in the healing of deep traumas.

We all have trauma, hell I know I do! I have experienced abandonment, sexual assault, verbal abuse, disappointments and daily external microaggressions that seem to come constantly. This is not addressing the internal battle of the buddha and the devilish functions via negative self talk, low self esteem and self harm. Any human being in this day and age is dealing with any number of traumatic and stressful factors. Is no wonder that suicides are on the rise and that the life expectancy is lower than any other generation? What are yours triggers? What have you done to treat or mitigate them? Did you know that cannabis can be a ally in your toolbox of strategies to win against this constant battle.

With all the newly envigored conversations about medical cannabis and the ever progressive adult use advocates screaming for freedom of use and social equity within communities most hard hit in the “war on drugs” (all points that I agree with mind you!) I think we are not having the conversations of how cannabis can be spiritually activating and can break down walls built up over time from collective and individual traumas, especially within the POC, Latinx and the LGBTQIA communities. As Stephen Grey the author of Spirituality and Cannabis asserts “we tend to be driven by narratives operating below the horizon of our awareness; the confused mind of the unresolved, unhealed ego—[through meditative cannabis we bring it] into the light of day ultimately allows us to learn how to function skillfully and gracefully as authentic, spiritually awakened beings.”

According to the author of Cannabis and Spirituality the use of cannabis or other herbal entheogenic plants have been a part of the history of the religious world for centuries. Historically humans have mostly used religion and/or spirituality to answer the questions of dealing with trauma. Meditative cannabis use just like any other ritual is about the intentions set before and the actions taken after that dictate and support that ritual, or as Stephen Grey worded it the “post-marijuana meditation” experience. Once we have gained the insight and reverse engineered that trauma what do we do with that new and heightened conscience state? Do we continue to create and perpetuate the patterns that made the scenarios that we found our lower selves in? Or do we choose to go another route? Some folks like medicine shamans Sean Hamman and Steve Dyer, say it has much to do with the state of mind and intentions of the grower of the cannabis even. So how important it is that we have a connection or personal relationship with the plant itself (home grow, anyone?)

I have chosen to take the higher road, although I still get in my Gemini feels sometimes, but I am a worthy work in progress. And I already see the benefit of incorporating my microdosing (which will be another blog and a podcast) and meditative cannabis rituals to heal myself, be a better and more authentic version of Angie; I can then take on the world and help others with those same tools with ease. Just as the great and venerable Bob Marley said “When you smoke the herb, it reveals you to yourself.” What a wondrous plant! Which side of yourself would you like to see in the forefront? Although we can never separate ourselves from the darker side and the traumas that feed it. We can use that side to shine even brighter bringing hope, joy and power to all that are around us.

I explore using cannabis as a tool for my sexual pleasure and fulfillment and for other people’s enjoyment, as well. BDSM is a tool to alter your consciousness. It takes you to a different place, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Pot is just like that. You have to know how to use it, and you have to use it wisely. When used the right way, it’s great tool for play in their mind and their body.

Mistress Matisse- How the BDSM community integrates cannabis into Kink

I have always be a naturally curious and exploratory type person. There isn’t much that scares me when it come to trying new things, being open to diving into a new adventure or creating a space to walk along the “wild” side. BDSM has always been something I desired to explore and know more about. But I also knew that this would not be a journey I undertook alone.

Photo by Alexander Krivitskiy from Pexels

From very young I was always strong willed, independent and prideful. I like to move to the beat of my own drum (even if I didn’t understand or know the beat). I wasn’t afraid to move against the grain. I had joked with some friends of mine that I lived in the ‘burbs on the city of BDSM, cause I wasn’t sure how to move into the city called Kink. Besides dabbling in the usual spanking, hair pulling and name calling I had not taken the full plunge off the deep end. Where do you go? Who has the map? But most importantly, will there be snacks?!?! I was confronted with the ENTIRE world before me but could not get my head wrapped around how to get started. Along this time my recreational cannabis use was normal. Nothing to crazy, I enjoyed it, had my fun when I could. One thing I did know is that stoned sex was the BEST sex and so it cemented in my head that if I were to ever go down that path cannabis would inevitable be a part of that journey.

BDSM + WEED = HAPPY

Photo by Michael Fischer from Pexels

So when I found my Sir (Dominate) the one who would hold my hand and take me lovingly on this journey of exploration, I was appalled that he would not allow me to do so while stoned. I couldn’t understand why he would take away something that I felt didn’t impede me, but actually opened my mind and body to whole new sensations. Being a chronic overthinking and perpetual Type A personality, cannabis helped me to quite some of the chatter in my head and just be in the moment with what was going on. To feel completely relaxed, engaged and connected to my Sir was my only desire. Within the BDSM community safety and consent are paramount so there are some that believe that being under the influence of cannabis is being intoxicated and therefore you cannot safely consent to what will be happening as you play. But reading the article ‘How the BDSM community integrates cannabis into kink‘ by Sophie Saint Thomas I see I’m not alone in my feeling of being able to use the mind and body high to bring my kink to a whole new level. Just having the ability to no longer worry about what others were thinking, how I would be viewed, the embarrassment of my body and all of those self sabotaging messages gone; I am simply a woman who is channeling my need for control and pain to elevate my mind.

While sitting on a cloudy day in a Parisian style cafe called Voo La Voo in Wilton Manors, eating delicious crepes; I discussed this very topic with my Sir to see if his views had changed. ‘There will and are so many people that look down on people that use while playing’, he said. I internally had to agree with him. The stigma of cannabis use as a drug is still prevalent and so it made sense that there are people who still believe it is a drug, point blank period. But I had to bring up to him (also to myself) that the societal acceptance of cannabis use as a medication and also for responsible recreation is changing and the kink world should take heed of that. While societal norms are changing shouldn’t the world of BDSM too? He seemed perplexed that I would still write this post. But to me like everything, representation matters and if I can be a voice for others or a example of how things are evolving then I will be. I take that challenge seriously, and hope that others will too when it comes to showing up in spaces that are hesitant to open up. And as we finished our raspberry crepes I felt the warm glow of indica embrace me and the topic seemed to change, but I knew it would all be alright.